I recently listened to an episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast featuring stylist and author Allison Bornstein—and one simple question stayed with me:
“How do I want to feel today?”
Not “What should I wear?”
Not “What looks good?”
Not even how I want others to see me —
but how I want to feel.
Starting here can shift everything: Getting dressed becomes a tool—something you can use to step into the version of yourself you want to be that day. Allison Bornstein suggests choosing three words to guide you before you step into your closet, and then building your outfit around that. I noticed that when I framed my day this way, I moved through it differently because I chose how I wanted to show up.
Soom Style #1: Team meeting at the office
I wanted to feel: effortless, grounded, confident
Effortless looked like a simple tee and shorts with a belt
Grounded led me to a sage green blazer — it felt steady and calm, and a blazer makes me feel quietly strong
Confident was my satin Stuart Weitzman loafers with socks — no heels, because let’s be real, I move far more confidently in flats
Soom Style #2: A slower, more relaxed day
I wanted to feel: cozy, put-together, fun
Cozy was wide-leg sweats from Uniqlo — easy, but structured enough so that they don’t really look like sweats
Put-together was a light sweatshirt draped over my shoulders — pulls everything together without trying too hard
Fun showed up in the accessories: rainbow stacked bead bracelets that added a pop
